Putting the Soul
back in Psychology!
The Truth about scrupulosity and perfection.
On 6.20.2023, the Gospel reading was, "Be perfect as your heavenly Father is perfect." Matthew 5:48
Setting aside the moral qualification of sin for a moment, it is an imperfection when we teach others in all-or-nothing statements that are objectively false even if we are accidentally miscommunicating by not saying what we mean and not meaning what we say.
Even worse is when this is done by someone who has responsibility in any teaching capacity. Stating opinions in a manner and tone as if they are facts and/or claiming one's beliefs as being from a higher authority than oneself when neither is the case is at the very least a prideful bad habit, while mistakes happen and no one outside of God is a perfect communicator.
That being said, it is a psychological fact that the way in which we speak and exactly what we say and how we say it, exhibits exactly what we truly believe to some extent, regardless of a lack of self-awareness or rationalizations such as, "that's not what I meant to say".
Furthermore, what we say and how we say it, especially when we are teaching others, exposes many other correlated beliefs we have and how we function, no matter how much we try to hide it.
For example, if someone states or teaches,
1) "Being perfect has nothing to do with being sinless in all things; you need to love your enemies, that is perfection."
Excuse me?! If this lie were true that would imply that God sins and only loves His enemies. Not so.
People who believe this lie will believe they are "perfect" when they are not.
People who believe this lie neither know what perfection is nor what sin is or how to recognize their own sins...because when we are unloving / uncharitable in any way, to any single human being (even those who are not our enemies) or unloving / uncharitable to God directly (including by indirectly rejecting His Truth and Love), we are NOT being perfect...Obviously.
Prayer for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that being perfect has nothing to do with being sinless in all things, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
One thing perfectionism is based in is a false belief of what perfection is, such as the lie quoted above and the following:
2) "You can actually continue to struggle with sins in your life, but if you obtain Truth, Humility, and Love, then you will be perfect according to Jesus´ teaching."
The person who believes this lie, in combination with the first lie quoted, does not quite understand basic moral theology. Each sin, no matter what it is or what degree the sin is, is the absence of Truth, Humility, and Love. No one can "struggle with sins" and obtain Truth, Humility, and Love in the ways and degrees that they are struggling with sin. To the degree and types of sins we struggle with, is the degree and type of LACK OF Truth, Humility and Love.
Prayer for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that I am perfect while I struggle with sins in my life, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
3) "Our Lord's call to perfection is rooted in humble suffering; you do that and don't worry about the rest."
This directly supports the lie that as long as we are tolerating and accepting all of our suffering and offering it to God, then we don't need to concern ourselves with anything else related to working on our sins; aka sanctification. These types of erroneous perspectives and attitudes lead the person who believes them to believe that in relationship to others, they are always an innocent victim whose unpleasant psychological emotions and feelings are never sins.
This type of perspective and attitude comes from negating and rejecting the Truth that much of our psychological / emotional / spiritual suffering is sinful that it is sinfully caused by us in what we are choosing to be attracted to, like, dislike, want/desire, expect, believe and think that is the absence of Truth/Love/Virtue, which means that just by particular psychological / emotional / spiritual sufferings existing inside of our soul, we lack Truth, Humility and Love in those ways.
And in logical sequence of events, this person will fail to repent of their emotional sins, blame all of their feelings on material causes and external situations, including people, and fail to become self-aware of their own interior intellectual sins both in general such as pride, self-righteousness, and arrogance, and specific such as the false belief, "It is not in the natural order of God for men to directly learn Truth from women; therefore I as a man do not need to learn Truth from any women.".
The person who believes, "Our Lord's call to perfection is rooted in humble suffering; you do that and don't worry about the rest," believes the contradiction in logic, that all of their negative emotions and feelings of which they blame on others who sin against them, are all virtuous emotions and feelings, while being caused by the sins of others. How can another person's sins cause your virtuous emotions and feelings? In any case, anything sinful cannot cause something virtuous.
Prayers for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that as long as I am tolerating and accepting all of my suffering and offering it to God, then I don't need to concern myself with anything else related to working on my sins; aka sanctification, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that it is not in the natural order of God for men to directly learn Truth from women; therefore I as a man do not need to learn Truth from any women, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that all my emotional suffering is virtuous, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, and show me which emotions and feelings are sins, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
4) "The virtue of humility which is the greatest of all virtues [of course the hardest to obtain], but this virtue is so powerful that a person could be sinful in every other way but they are humble and for that reason they will still get to heaven by the Grace of God."
This lie "cleverly" sandwiched in-between two Truths is pure delusional insanity, i.e. completely demonic and moral theological heresy. In no way in objective reality can a person be humble and be sinful in every other way at the same time. It is absolutely impossible.
The basis for ALL sin is pride, which is the absence of humility, which means every time we sin in any way, we do NOT have humility. Therefore it is impossible to "be sinful in every other way and be humble".
The person who believes this lie doesn't understand what humility is, much less understand what sin is. A person who doesn't understand humility, but believes they do, has little to no humility, and therefore will be unable to teach the subject of humility to others, much less understand it properly themselves. If this person is a priest, then he will also be pridefully believing he knows more than the laity, especially women, just because he is a priest and a man, and he will either be grievously failing to work directly with Jesus Christ in order to become self-aware of ALL of his sins, especially pride, and/or will be refusing to learn the Truth about his sins when and through whom God wants to teach him, including the laity, his family, and women.
What is humility? Humility is the Virtue needed to be able to want, recognize, accept, and live Truth/Love/Virtues. Because God is Truth/Love/Virtues, He cannot be separated from Himself. Humility is the basis for all other virtues.
The solution to this problem is doing the humility prayers daily.
Prayers for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I am prideful, heal me, replace it with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth, fill me with Humility, and show me Your Truth about my pride; Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry my perspectives and attitudes on everyone and everything are wrong, heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth, especially Humility, and give me all of Your Perspectives and Attitudes on everyone and everything; Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry my priorities and judgements on everyone and everything are wrong, heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth, especially Humility, and give me all of Your Priorities and Judgements on everyone and everything; Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry my wants and desires on everyone and everything are wrong, heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth, especially Humility, and give me all of Your Wants and Desires on everyone and everything; Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that a person can be sinful in every other way and be humble at the same time, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
5) "On the opposite scale if the person has the sin of pride and yet they have virtue in every other way, they will still go to hell because pride is so deadly."
First, a person cannot both have the sin of pride and be virtuous in every other way, because humility is the basis for all Virtues and the absence of pride. Second, all humans who sin have pride, because each sin is based in pride. Therefore, if this lie were true, that would mean that every single human being who sins in any way is going to hell.
As a result of believing this lie, the person will want to believe the lie that they are not prideful in any way, and will never want to recognize and repent daily of their sin of pride out of fear of going to hell if they even have pride. This person is suffering from the sins of perfectionism and scrupulosity, afraid of going to hell, fear of punishment, and distrust in God's love, forgiveness, and mercy. Sadly, this person doesn't know the Love of God at all.
St. Augustine taught, only doing what is right out of fear of suffering, i.e. punishment, is still a sin.
In any moment that we sin, we have pride. To be prideful / I am prideful, is how English is correctly used to describe when we have the sin of pride / behave in pride. Because, if we were to say in English, 'I am priding', that makes no sense in English grammar. And if we were to say, 'I am pride', that would wrongly make the sin our entire identity. When we sin, that sin is part of our character, and our character is part of who we currently are (hopefully temporarily), but not our entire identity.
Prayers for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that if the person has the sin of pride and yet they have virtue in every other way, they will still go to hell because pride is so deadly, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that a person can have the sin of pride and be virtuous in all other ways at the same time, they will still go to hell because pride is so deadly, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
"Humility is the foundation of all the other virtues, hence, in the soul in which this virtue does not exist there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance." ~Saint Augustine
6) "The humble person who pushes around a cart full of vices--he'll go to heaven, because of that humility. Because it ultimately manifests in love and willing to suffer for you enemies."
In objective reality of human behavior and moral theology, a person who has one vice / idolatry / addiction / sin, much less a cart full of them, has little to no humility and is full of pride. The person who believes this lie quoted is trying to justify their own vices, which means they are supporting and enabling others' vices as well. Woe to this person if they are in any position of authority in any way with anyone. The best thing this person can do for themselves and everyone else is to stop teaching, counseling, or directing others related to God and morality and sit with Jesus Christ daily for hours in silence asking Him to feel and know his Love and to know exactly what all of their vices / idolatrys are and to be shown all of the lies that they believe about everything.
Prayers for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that a person can be humble and push around a cart full of vices at the same time, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that a person who pushes around a cart full of vices has a lot or any humility, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that a person with one or more mortal sin vices will go to heaven if they die without repenting, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that the virtue of humility alone is enough for someone to go to heaven, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
7) "But the proud person who pushes around a cart full of virtues will still go to hell, because pride, pride is so deadly. It overcomes all other virtues."
With this lie, this person is doubling down on the lies that have been previously quoted. This person doesn't understand that all sins and all virtues exist in degrees. A person who has "a cart full of virtues" cannot suffer from the amount of pride that would send them to hell. A person having the sin of pride, alone, does NOT send anyone to hell.
Prayers for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that a prideful person can push around a cart full of virtues at the same time, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that the sin of pride alone is enough to send someone to hell, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
8) "Because pride is so deadly it ruins all other virtues. Humility is so good it perfects all other vices."
Pride is the absence of all virtues and Humility is the absence of all vices. A vice cannot be perfected, it has to be replaced i.e. eliminated.
Prayer for Healing
Jesus I'm sorry I believe the lie that vices are perfected by humility rather than replaced, please heal me, fill me with Your Graces, Virtues, Love, and Truth to replace this lie, and show me Your Truth about why I believe this lie, Thank You Jesus for Your Healing, Truth, and Love.
In conclusion, the person who believes and thinks in these irrational ways quoted throughout this article doesn't understand basic moral theology regarding sin, virtuousness, and perfection, which exposes that they are not only suffering from the sin of scrupulosity, they are also rejecting God and His Truth in many ways, which means that this person has one or more idolatries / addictions / vices that they need to become self-aware of, fully repent of, and stop asap. Along with the fact that any person with any type of idolatry / addiction / vice, is causing themselves to be obsessed (oppressed) by a demon to some degree, and will therefore also be causing themselves anxiety and/or depression.
When we believe lies about God, we will also believe lies about ourselves and other people. When we believe lies about God, we cannot know who God is and cannot know, feel, and experience God's Love, and therefore we cannot get to know and Love either ourselves, or others.
We cannot know God when we are doing any vice / addiction / bad coping, all of which are idolatry. Idolatry is what we make more important than God, meaning we primarily and/or only do the vice / addiction / bad coping or go to the vice / addiction / bad coping in order to deal with our unpleasant emotions and stop feeling emotionally bad and start feeling emotionally better, rather than going daily directly to Jesus Christ in repentance for lasting healing, while asking for His Love and Truth.